Parashat Vayera- Do What I Do

Vayera eilav Hashem b’eilonei Mamre, v’hu yosheiv petach haohel k’chom hayom.  And Hashem appeared to him (Avraham) by the trees of Mamre, and he sat in his tent opening during the heat of the day.

This is the opening verse to parashat Vayera.  On the surface it seems simple that Avraham would be sitting in his tent during the heat of the day, but generations of rabbinic commentary teach us that it is anything but.  First, God appears to Avraham.  God does not speak to Avraham; God simply appears, then is gone by the time we reach the second verse of the parasha. In the last verse of Lech Lecha, Avraham and all the males of his household were circumcised.   Immediately following is God’s appearance. The Rabbis connect these together; declaring that God is performing the mitzvah of bikkur holim, visiting the sick.  From these few words, Vayera eilav Hashem b’eilonei Mamre, And Hashem appeared to him by the trees of Mamre, we learn of our obligation to fulfill this mitzvah.  Further, God does not speak to Avraham, nor overstay the visit.  From this we learn to sit and just be with the person we visit, not an easy task.  It is companionable time, not time to fill with idle talk, which may have the added problem of causing the ill person to feel s/he has to respond.  God is also gone by the next verse, teaching us not to overstay our welcome.

But the verse doesn’t end its teachings there. The second half of the verse reads, “v’hu yosheiv petach haohel k’chom hayom, and he sat in his tent opening during the heat of the day.”  Avraham and Sarah are known in our tradition to be the ultimate hosts.  Even in his weakened condition, Avaraham is sitting in the tent opening watching for the opportunity to do hachnast orechim, to give welcome to guests. 

There’s almost too much to write on this subject.  Here are the rules of hachnasat orechim we learn from Avraham.

•        Avraham is sitting in the opening of his tent available and welcoming.  Tradition teaches that their tent was open on all sides so no guest could go by uninvited. (18:1)
•        Doesn’t wait for the guests to come to him.  He runs to greet them and bring them to his home. (18:2)
•        He is deferential- bows to them, “I am your servant.” (18:3)
•        Makes them comfortable and sees to their needs- offers water to wash their feet in the heat of the day (18:4)
•        Feeds them- first a light snack, then a meal(s) with choice ingredients (18:5-8)

Hospitality is a big deal in desert cultures, where it can mean the difference between life and death.  Still today, although Jews have spread throughout the world, adapting to new cultures and climates, hospitality is considered one of the greatest mitzvot.  So ingrained is this that the first lesson I learned at JTS was “If you feed them, they will come.”  The importance of this mitzvah in Jewish life can be seen in the following:

•        The statement at Pesach, “All who are hungry, let them come and eat.”
•        The over-flowing food at a shiva home, both caring for the mourners, but also providing hospitality to those who come to visit.
•        Most Jewish meetings have some nosh, and we like to share.  I was once sent home from a meeting at UJA with a doggie bag.
•        You actually cannot crash a simcha with a seudat mitzvah.  All of JTS attended Jesse’s bris, inc. the high school on the grounds.) (now that b’nei mitzvah, and most s’machat are by invite, many have the custom of giving a portion to Mazon)
•        And finally, there is a custom that there must be food on the table for birkat hamazon, “V’achalta, v’savata, u’v’rachta;  you will eat, be satisfied, and bless.” If there aren’t leftovers you didn’t make enough.