I've just finished davening. (That's praying for the Yiddish-ly impaired.) Throughout the week I use a number of different siddurim for my t'fillot. At home I use the new Sacks siddur, Birnbaum, or the Sim Shalom. At the office I use Va'Ani T'filati, the siddur published by the Masorti Movement in Israel. I like using Va'Ani T'filati. It's all in Hebrew, and so it's thin and light. It took some getting use to though. In all the t'fillot, wherever the word avoteinu, our fathers, or any of its derivatives appears, it is followed by imoteinu, or the appropriate counterpart. It's hard to read over words. How do you know to skip a word if you haven't read it. If you've read it, haven't you added it to your t'fillot?
Why is this a big deal? In the grand scheme of things it probably isn't. But in my small world it's very important. You see, I do not add the Imahot (the matriarchs) into my t'fillot. Those making assumptions about me as a woman rabbi should check out my description of me. It says "I'm not what you think." For those free thinkers without preconceived notions, I should explain. Many people assume that because I am a woman rabbi I am automatically on the left of the Movement. I am not. Many believe I will automatically add the Imahot, the Matriarchs, into my t'fillot because, after all, if I really understood how disenfranchised women have been before me, and fought to enable me to become a rabbi, I would want to do something about it.
I think that's way too simple. I don't usually use the word feminist due to the baggage with which it has been encumbered over the decades, but my reason is a feminist one. I examine Judaism historically and sociologically. I believe that women have always been the strong leaders of the people Israel, from the time Sarah challenges Avraham with the words, "God will judge between me and you!" (Breishit 16:5) If you didn't know the answer, God chooses Sarah. In studying Jewish history, I have discovered women who were rebbes and women who were rabbis. (In my mind, rebbes have a special connection to God beyond that of us mere mortals.) True, it was hard to rise beyond traditional societal roles to fulfill these positions, but that had more to do with society than with Judaism. There is no halakhic reason a woman cannot be a rabbi.
But the t'fillot, some will ask, aren't they exclusionary? I say no. Hebrew is a gendered language. As anyone who studies languages with gender knows, a plural word that is masculine does not necessarily refer only to men. Avoteinu can be translated as our fathers, but it can also be translated, with no acrobatics, as our ancestors. To me, the addition of the Imahot is a statement that our matriarchs are not included in the intention of the prayer. That would mean that the significance of women in our history was excluded for centuries until modern feminists decided to add them. I do not accept that. I understand that some people feel pushed out. But I have always read t'fillot to include me, and I would venture to say that those who feel left out of Jewish life and Jewish text are more effected by culture than the actual t'fillot or halakhah.
But the Amidah, some will argue, it contains the names Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Yes, that prayer speaks to specific relationships each had with God. It mentions only those three, all men. T'fillot were generally written by men, and they looked to the historical figures with whom they related. I understand those who want to add Imahot into the start of the Amidah. However, I am not so unenlightened as to think that I can only relate to a prayer that mentions women. I can appreciate the relationships. For me, adding Sarah, Rivka, Rachel, and Leah is choosing due to their marital status instead of their special relationships or leadership qualities. Why not Rivka, Miriam, Devorah, and Hulda? There is also a point at which brachot were set. There is a beauty to the fact that Jews everywhere, reciting a traditional liturgy, can all pray together because we recite the same prayers. Just because others seek to exclude me, does not mean I allow myself to be excluded.
Have a great day.
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