Someone Needs to Explain This!

I need someone to tell me why this happens.  Why do seemingly normal people suddenly choose to put antlers and red noses on their cars.  It's bad enough that people torture their pets at this time of year.  Many, many dogs, and some cats (cat people don't like to see that look of derision on their cats, and so usually avoid the holiday costumes), are subject to the humiliation of Hanukah kippot, candle hats or dreidel costumes, Santa hats, ugly Christmas sweaters, antlers, and elf costumes. At least the animals can look upon their people with scorn.  "If I could only work the can opener and the door knob I'd be outta here!" clearly written on their faces.  In extreme cases they can bark, whine, scratch, and/or bite to protect themselves from the most demeaning of holiday wear.

Cars, on the other hand, are inanimate objects.  They are not cute.  They are meant to convey others from place to place.  The y can be practical or majestic.  They can be cool or odd.  However, no matter what kind, it is embarrassing to all inside to be riding in a car that has been ridiculously decorated.  At least those who place Hanukah menorot atop their cars, although looking stupid, have an excuse that the commandment for Hanukah is to publicize the miracle.  What excuse can be made for dressing you car as Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?  None!  There is no excuse!  On top of that, it's Rudolph in his early days.  The antlers can hardly be called that.  They are small sticks completely disproportionate to the car. 

I love Christmas.  I love the music and the lights.  I love that I can enjoy all the joy without having to untangle light strings.  I do enough of that for Sukkot.  But seriously folks, this is unacceptable.  Do not demean yourselves with small sticks and red noses on you cars.  And when the holidays are over, do not put lips, eyelashes, horns, or testicles, especially blue ones on your car or truck.  Yes, I have seen all these things.  Stop the madness!