I love winter. I love bundling up in my long wool coat. I love my scarf, my gloves, my earmuffs. I love my boots. I enjoy shoveling snow. Even in March, when most people are thoroughly done with winter, I am not complaining. To me winter is a time of mystery and promise. Spring is not possible without the frost of winter. Many plants and seeds must go through the freeze of winter before they can bloom. The entire world is pregnant with anticipation.
What I knew, but never fully realized the impact of, is Sean's part in this. I've loved winter since I was a child. It has been my favorite season for a long time. Having children, however, can change things. They impact your life in ways never expected. For me and winter, it is not the children directly, but school hours.
I am NOT a morning person. Even with a full eight to ten hours, I need light to wake. Sean is an extreme morning person. One note from the alarm clock, and he pops from bed fully awake, alert, and, worst of all, happy. Even in the best of circumstances I take three to five minutes to even realize that annoying noise I hear is actually music, and means it's time to get up. I am slow, off-balance. I don't like to talk to anyone because it's much to much work to think.
How does this effect my love of winter? It doesn't actually. I effects my ability to enjoy winter. For the past two weeks it's been pitch black when my alarm rings. Even on the rare occasions when I've slept enough, I feel the effects of waking in the dark for hours after. Sean has always taken the first shift of waking the children. He makes the lunches. He turns on the children's lights. He begins the process while I sleep. By the time my alarm rings, the first rays of light have begun to brighten the sky. Waking in the darkness leaves me with a headache and drained feeling that lasts well into the morning, if not through the day.
I treasure Sundays. They're a time to sleep into the light. Full hours of of sleep, waking only when the sun's rays brighten my room. Unfortunately, many Sundays are so full this is not an option. Today was to be one of those rare days with nothing to mar the morning. Of course mentsch tracht, Gott lacht (man plans; God laughs). After three hours of sleep, which felt like twenty minutes, Gavi appeared in my room. He had a stomach ache. After a bit of cuddling, he began to throw up. A few more hours of sleep, more vomiting. Add in two cats wrestling on my bed (and my feet). It was not a banner night for sleep. Today I need to buy carpet cleaner.
On to karate grading (Jesse's is getting his brown advanced belt) and a bar mitzvah party, and I doubt sleep will come today.
